Diamonds Are Forever
by Ceillean
Summary: Kyp and Jaina are undercover as a wealthy married couple to help Lando find a thief aboard his pleasure cruise ship. They did not, however, plan on meeting Jagged Fel, Jaina's boyfriend, in the midst of their mission...


Standing in front of the enormous mirror that nearly took in half the wall, Jaina turned from side to side and sucked in her tummy. The dress was definitely way too tight.

"Who voluntarily wears something like this?" She muttered, tugging at the expensive fabric with just two fingers and making a face at her reflection. In the boutique she'd been dragged to, the dress had looked nice. A beautiful dark red gown with a low neckline and a black velvet flowery pattern but once she'd squeezed into the thing (and once her body actually remembered how to breathe again), it wasn't all that nice or beautiful anymore.

It was highly uncomfortable. And as she turned her head and stared down at the matching shoes that went with the outfit, she shuddered. These were weapons, not shoes. High heeled fracking _weapons_.

There was a quiet knock on the fresher door. Jaina scowled. "I'm not done yet!"

"Aw, sweetheart. We're going to be late. Unless you want me to go ahead and tell the others that my cuddly-wuddly doodle bug is stuck in the fresher making herself pretty?"

Jaina spun around towards the door. Or rather, tried to. Her feet caught in the skirt and she barely managed to brace herself against the wall. "I swear to all Gods of the universe, Kyp. I will hurt you tonight."

"Is that a promise?"

"Go away!"

"Oh, muffin. Is that any way to talk to your husband?"

"_Kyp_!"

She heard him laugh, a very evil laugh, and no doubt he was having the time of his life. Kyp was the kind of guy who could get into character within seconds. Going under cover was easy for him. For Jaina? Not so much.

"Seriously, Jaina. We'll be late." He knocked again. "How much longer?"

She bent forward slowly, praying that her gown wouldn't rip. She swept up the shoes from the floor, tucked them underneath her arm and slowly shuffled towards the door. When she activated the controls and the door swung open, Kyp stood there with a shavit-eating grin on his face.

And as much as it pained her to admit, the man looked _good_.

He wore a black suit that fit him quite well, showing off his athletic built. Surprisingly, his hair was open, fanning out over his shoulders in dark brown waves. And in his right hand, he was holding a simple black cane.

Jaina arched an eyebrow. "What's with the cane?"

"Fashion statement, love."

She dropped the shoes onto the floor and didn't even dignify his comment with a reply. Obviously, he was having way too much fun.

"Where'd you put the diamonds?" He asked.

Jaina gestured to a low sideboard next to the Queen sized bed. Which, of course, she was _never_ going to share with him. Not even in her wildest dreams.

Well, maybe in her wildest dreams.

"The necklace is in the lowest drawer. The earrings in the top."

She slipped her feet into the shoes and even though she wobbled a bit at first, walking back and forth a few times gave her the confidence she needed to stay upright.

Kyp came back with the diamond necklace and the earrings and handed them over. "Hard to believe this is worth a fortune."

"More than a fortune." Jaina said, carefully handling the necklace and opening the clasp. "These gems are literally priceless."

Kyp helped her lay the necklace around her neck and then Jaina put on the earrings. And next, she twisted her hair up into a messy hairdo but, according to various fashion magazines she'd read to get ready for this mission, messy hair was the way to go.

To Jaina, it looked like there was a birds' nest sitting on top of her head.

But the jewelry was perfectly visible and that's all that counted.

"Ready, Misses Daneel Jaxon?" Kyp held out his arm for her to take.

"Guess so, Mister…" She hesitated and drew her brows down into a deep frown.

"Really." Kyp said. "You forgot your husband's name?"

"Yes! Because you picked a stupid name."

"Did not."

"Aero Pawk? Congrats, Kyp. You're a sound effect."

* * *

_The Love Boat_ was a marvelous ship, a pleasure cruise for the high and mighty and definitely for the wealthiest of the galaxy. Dressed in the most expensive attire money could buy, hundreds of individuals mingled about holding crystal glasses in their hands filled with sparkling golden champagne. Golden rings glittered on fingers, colorful gems twinkled as the light touched in just the right angle. And exaggerated laughter was everywhere.

"We should be getting paid for this." Jaina mumbled between her teeth as she clutched Kyp's arm and smiled brightly, waving at someone she didn't know but who obviously thought they were best friends. The woman in question squeezed through the crowd and approached holding, of all things, a recording device.

"Misses Jaxon. I've heard so much about you." The woman began. Jaina blinked. She'd heard about a non existing person? But then it clicked. This wasn't about Misses Daneel Jaxon at all. It was about the diamonds, the priceless jewelry adorning her neck and ears.

"And you are?" Kyp asked in a gruff voice.

"Oh." The woman blushed as she met Kyp's eyes and…she giggled. A woman in her mid forties giggled.

Jaina tried not to shake her head. Instead, she put on her sweetest smile and moved closer to her "husband". She gave the woman the stink eye, of course. She was giggling at her "husband", after all.

"Teena Mae." She offered her hand and as Kyp, aka Aero Pawk, shook it, his hand came back holding a small white card. "I'm with the Imperial News Agency. I'm writing an article on the exotic pieces of jewelry displayed aboard the ship. Your necklace caught my attention almost immediately, Misses Jaxon. Last I heard the _Blood Diamonds_ were under lock and key in a museum."

"That's correct." Jaina said but didn't offer anything more. For all she knew, Teena Mae was the person they were looking for.

"It was a pleasure making your acquaintance." Kyp said and, for the love of the Force, winked at the poor woman. Going by the red in her cheeks, it wouldn't have been a surprise, if she'd fainted right then and there. "But we're needed elsewhere."

Kyp led the way down a flight of stairs, covered with a thick red carpet. Below, underneath a vast expanse of a viewport, the crowd stood around low tables while a live band played on a stage. Serving droids as well as waiters and waitresses tended to the guests and security guards, pretending to be inconspicuous but failing to do so, made sure everything was going according to plan.

"We fit in perfectly, don't we?" Kyp asked, reaching for a flute of champagne as a serving unit passed by.

"That's easy for you to say. You can still breathe freely." Jaina said, tugging at her dress.

"Stop fiddling, sweetheart. You look gorgeous."

The band on stage finished with their song and the lights suddenly dimmed as the host of the charity event, Lando Calrissian himself, walked on stage with the biggest grin ever. The crowd applauded for several minutes, with Lando waving and bowing and generally just enjoying himself a bit too much.

"Thank you all for coming!" His voice boomed over the speakers. "Ladies and gentlebeings, I am awed to see so many beautiful individuals on one spot. Welcome to _The Love Boat_." Another round of applause before he continued. "This charity event is to collect for worlds devastated by the war and thus help to rebuild what so many have lost. So I ask of you to open your hearts and help where help is needed." He gestured forward and on the other side of the room, a screen descended from the ceiling, playing a short documentary about the ongoing war and what needed to be done. It was definitely a mood killer but Jaina knew Lando. He'd have the crowd dancing in no time.

When the documentary was over and silence settled in place of quiet chatter, Lando took his place on the stage again. "Now, let's get on with the show, shall we? I'd like to welcome a very special guest onto the stage. She is known for over a fifteen wonderful movies. She's won ten Imperial Movie Awards and her first music album was number one for more than eighteen weeks. Please give a round of applause for Wynssa Starflare!"

Jaina raised her brows and leaned closer to Kyp. "Did you know she was here?" She raised her voice to be heard.

"Nope. Does it matter?"

Well, Jaina wasn't really sure yet. Wynssa Starflare, better known as Syal Fel, wasn't known to appear in public as the celebrity she used to be. Especially not without her husband.

Wynssa walked on stage with such elegance, it nearly made Jaina jealous. Not to mention her fabulous good looks. She wore her blond hair in gorgeous curls around her shoulders. Her gown was a beautiful light blue made from shimmer silk and it nearly glowed in the bright lights as she moved along the stage.

Jaina didn't pay attention to her speech, though. The crowd started to laugh suddenly but Jaina had no idea why because up on the stage, standing in the shadows behind his mother stood Jagged Fel.

Now, this mission had been difficult from the very beginning but it was manageable. She could pretend to be married to a wealthy salesman, she could pretend to actually care about jewelry and gems and she could definitely find a thief amongst thieves.

But all this with Jag in the midst, who had no idea about this little charade?

_This_ was going to be a problem.


End file.
